22.2.13

Esoteric conundrums.


Waiting is a game and we've all being doing it for as long as we can remember. But you’d think that after having playing the waiting game for umpteen years, something (or even someone) would have come around by now.
Only god knows what I’ve had to endure, waiting for everything to become ameliorated.  But here we are and yet, nothing’s changed. Yes, old habits die hard, but I’m letting myself get fucked over and dragged into this deleterious hole. Even if I tried, even if I had helping hands, I wouldn’t be able to climb out of it. I’m trapped, I’m tied to you, and I can’t escape.
For far too long, have you let your selfish needs stand between what we have. You don’t care that I’m here, you’re just glad that I am here; You know that no matter how bad things, get I will ALWAYS be here at the end of the day. You know who I am, and you know how I work. It’s basically carved in stone. You’ve some insidious scheme going on, and you don’t care who you hurt along the way. I don’t quite exactly know what your motives are, going on about what you do on weekends, but if spending your time away from me, far from me as possible is your goal, I can promise you that I won’t be around much longer. The tables have turned and I have incentives in life. You are no longer a priority, just as I am not yours. You're not better than anything anymore, if anything you are worse. I have better things going on in my life and to waste all my time on something that just isn't going to reciprocate anything is just not worth my efforts or time. To berate you is a choice, but I’m tired of mothering you. You’re not a child anymore, so if your lackadaisical approach is the method you decide taking on to salvage what’s left of this mess, buddy, you’re in for a big shock.