TOD

I don't want to be here long enough to sit and watch everything spiral out of control.

Get out of my life. Get out of my life. Get out of my life.

Simple, but not easy.

I wished I could have had that life with you.

The last of you

Saying goodbye to the last few pieces that I wished I wouldn't ever have to part with. But don't you worry, I will never forget.

I'm losing sight of all that I have dreamed of. Day by day, every little bit of effort I have diminishes, hope fades, and I feel myself sinking deeper and deeper into agonising pain.

I don't know what to do anymore. I need your help but you won't give me what I need to get through this. I wish I could tell you everything that's been on my mind. But I'm afraid of what you'll say or how you'll act. Every time I've tried to open myself up to you, you tell me there's no reason for it or I'm acting like a child. I can't explain what I'm feeling to you. I can't even understand it myself. All I know is that it's been here for a long time now and I cannot find a way to get myself out of this hell. 

Maybe it's just the chemistry in my brain that's all messed up. Maybe it's something else. I'm beginning to think that there's no way of fixing this anymore.  

With nothing left to keep me grounded, I just want to shut the world out. I want to shut everything out. I want to get away.